fruityjam

No more cookie cutter template!

2007-10-07T08:51:00.000+08:00

Yay. New layout.

I'm pretty damn freaking hell glad it finally works.

Now I feel like making another one...

edit: And another one.

Myanmar Hot Update

2007-10-03T21:07:00.000+08:00

We interrupt the current programme, Bioshock and Harmful Violent Video Games, to bring you this exclusive breaking news update.

Lol.

Nice move.

/sarcasm

Bioshock and Harmful Violent Video Games (Part 1)

2007-09-28T16:39:00.001+08:00

Everybody knows that violent video games are harmful.

Most people are aware that these games are harmful to game characters receiving the violent treatment. However, a significant majority do not know that violent video games are also harmful to those who play them.

For example, use the AK-47 too often in Counter-Strike and you will find yourself drawn towards the nearest firearms peddler on your next trip to Somalia.
(market price is between $30 - $125 according to this reliable source. do not get fleeced)

Likewise, Quake veterans find themselves itching for rocket launchers once they get separated from their computers. This also explains why the Light Anti-Tank Weapon (LAW) is such a highly sought after item in NS. It is in fact so highly sought after that any outward intention to wield it is seen as a death challenge to others. As a result, it usually seems as though nobody is willing to carry it. Do not be deceived though, it is the weapon of their pixelated dreams.

At this point, a member of the ignorant masses might object. He or she might ask, "What really is the basis for such ridiculous claims?". Depending on audience segmentation, this might also come across as "Li gong simi lanjiao?!!".

The masses need justification. They want facts and figures, the more the merrier, never mind about readability. Colourful charts are a definite plus.

Here at fruityjam.blogspot.com, I pride myself on delivering real life cold hard brutal facts, backed by nothing but more facts.

To prove my argument I have invited a neutral party as the guest blogger for this post. He is known in academia as the "Prince of Social Science Research". Most recognize him for his ground-breaking pioneering work involving post-its and Microsoft Excel. Please welcome, the Distinguished Lucia V. Adalhard Professor from the University of Mallorea, Professor Arthur William Patrick Albert.
(text in royal purple written by the esteemed Professor)

Kokleong has proven beyond reasonable doubt that Violent Video Games (VVGs), in addition to causing harm to characters subject to violent treatment, also cause harm to users who play the games.

Kokleong's ground-breaking research on VVGs followed the absolute most strict guideline on statistically significant research, ever. His methodology and analysis were flawlessly executed, leaving any Academic worth his beard with no ground for argument.

Of exceptional high standard was the series of t-tests carried out. Kokleong devised an ingenius statistical method that transcends the abstract world of numbers. His unique fusion of traditional t-tests and material milk resulted in a physical manifestation of descriptive statistics.

I believe Kokleong calls this method of his, the T-Peng.

Fig. E26: The physical manifestation of T-Peng statistics

The validity of Kokleong's statistics on VVGs scored 12.7 on a scale of 1 to 10. This falls within the range of "more real than real".
(for sake of comparison, Jesus' magnus opus, The Bible, scored 8.6 on the same scale)

The accuracy and reliability of his statistics scored 11.2 on a similar scale of 1 to 10. This means that his work is actually more reliable than your family.

I hereby conclude that Kokleong's research on VVGs is statistically valid, and rather sweet.

The impact of my research outside Academia was apparent when I bought Bioshock a few days back. The hint was coyly situated on the back of the DVD case, at the bottom right corner.

(to be continued...)

Ron Paul 2008 (Part 3)

2007-09-28T15:49:00.000+08:00

[ ...continued from Ron Paul 2008 (Part 2)]

I think Ron Paul will make a good President.

US politics is so interesting.

(end)

Ron Paul 2008 (Part 2)

2007-09-15T16:05:00.000+08:00

[...continued from Ron Paul 2008 (Part 1)]

Politics in Singapore is worthy of interest only as far as nudity is concerned. Fortunately, or unfortunately, this places us in a dilemma which can be best described in the following thought experiment.

"Channel Six is broadcasting a 10-minute feature on Nude Politicians in Singapore. This feature consists of two equal segments, each with extensive nude footage of a prominent politician. One segment will showchase Lee Hsien Loong, while the other will be about Eunice Olsen. If you choose to watch the programme, you must watch all 10 minutes without covering any portion of the screen.

Will you watch the programme?"

I will not attempt to resolve the soul-crushing moral issue that confronts us at this point. It is a tricky task best left for our wise Philosophy Professors, both bearded and unbearded, to deal with.
(feel free to borrow my thought experiment for your Philosophy assignments)

Instead, I will dive straight into my ground-breaking, sea-splitting, sky-rending analysis of, “What makes a Über Politician™”.

All notable über figures in history were not self-made man. Aside from the unproven rumour that they were made by their parents, one theory states that these über men were so fucking intense due to certain legendary artifacts in their possession.

Could Hitler have changed the world without the Spear of Longinus?
Could King Arthur have withstood Morgan le Fay without trusty Excalibur??
Could 孙悟空 have stood a chance against the belligerent man-lobsters without his 如意棒???

I don’t think so.

Likewise for politics, there exists an item that boosts political aptitude beyond one’s wildest imagination. Few know of its existence, and even fewer have any idea how it looks like.
Behold!... The Headdress Astronomic Xtreme!

The Headdress Astronomic Xtreme, or commonly known as HAX (or h4x), was last reportedly seen on the head of Junichiro Koizumi.

Before it came to be sown on Koizumi’s head, the HAX was re-bonded and dyed black in order to conceal it from power hungry politicians. Thanks to the wonders of DNA proofing, there is now indisputable proof that the HAX-in-hiding was actually residing on the head of a Japanese female named Sadako.

This in turn serves as conclusive evidence that the HAX does not work on females, or we might now be living in more peaceful times.

(to be continued…)

Ron Paul 2008 (part 1)

2007-09-12T04:00:00.000+08:00

Like every other human being in the multiverse, I cannot live without my inalienable rights.

My recipe for well-being involves a healthy dosage of freedom, justice, peace, and democracy. Perceived or otherwise. Particularly democracy.

On some days, when it gets wet and miserable, a select group of damp neurons in my brain catch a cold and sneeze. The violent blast sends a crazy idea bouncing around the insides of my skull.

Change the Weather.

It was this particular day, as I stood under a bus shelter contemplating the mildly interesting idea of Changing the Weather, that a mynah flew across the road and dumped its load.

I was inspired.

Why not change the country instead?

Raindrops steadily pounded the mynah's poop. It was a battle of nature versus poop. Sure enough, poop could not take nature's relentless assault and began to run.

To my horror, the running poop started to form two "P" shaped words right smack in the middle of the road. As if on cue, an apple flew from behind and landed neatly between the "P" shaped streams of poop.

The poop-apple-rain omen was clear, as my horror dissolved into resignation and evaporated into disgust.

The bus swerved into sight, and I wonder if I will see that cute girl in school today.

(to be continued...)

D&D stats and games

2007-08-21T22:35:00.000+08:00

If you were an AD&D (3ed) character, what stats would you have?
What kind of characters do you enjoy playing most in MMORPGs?
Do these characters reflect the person that you are?

This post basically concerns the above 3 questions. Sounds like intense fun.

The first question really got me thinking, for like 10 minutes.
What is it like to roleplay myself?
The Neverwinter Nights 2 shortcut on my desktop comes in extra handy this time around.

From a powergamer's point of view, my stats are hopeless...
Crap I'm not gonna survive in NWN2.

10 str means I'll have to rely on dex feats to stand a chance against those lvl 1 rats.

I'll probably last 0.5 rounds in combat with 10 con.

15 intel... well I'm not that stupid.

14 wis however isn't nearly enough to defeat the alarm clock.

I really would (like to) think that my best stat is dex. I am DEXTEROUS!

Now for the 2nd question...
What kind of characters do you enjoy playing most in MMORPGs?

I tend to play rogue-like classes.

Even though my main character (aka main) on Dark Age of Camelot was a druid, I had most fun playing stealthers. My main on World of Warcraft was a rogue. My main on Tabula Rasa is a soldier on the way to becoming a spy. Warhammer Online doesn't even have stealth/rogue kinda classes... I was forced to create a Magus and a Bright Wizard.

You get my point now huh... and for the last question,
Do these characters reflect the person that you are?

Well yes they do!!! My favoured MMORPG classes indeed match up with my real life AD&D stats! (sorta)

Could this be a Grande Coincidence? Or perhaps it is a sign for me to buy a belt of frost giant's strength at the earliest opportunity.

Come to think of it, this match-up applies for my close friends as well...

Mai tu liao. Go figure out your real life AD&D stats today!

huh wtf?!

2007-05-29T21:26:00.000+08:00

this SMU ad is so stupid that I feel stupid just lookin at it.

if this ad was a game character it probably rolled a 6 for intelligence at creation.

(and a 6 for charisma too)

Sometimes, putting cheerful looking people in ads work. Sometimes it doesn't. Especially when it looks fake and doesn't make any sense.

This ad however might look much better with a minor addition. Here's my version, an ad for children discipline trainers.

Much better isn't it.

I flip through the papers and the NUS, SMU ads smack me in the face in rapid succession. Both very different, both very stupid.

(Sometimes they are even placed on alternate pages. e.g. 5, 7)

As a Singaporean, you don't have many choices when it comes to studyin here.

Take your pick:

NUS: oooo "witty" wordplay between "n" and "nus". they must be smart. clevernus!

SMU: I WILL BE SO HAPPY AT SMU. SMU STANDS FOR SMiley Uni. RIGHT.

NTU: don't even get me started on those copycat ads at bus shelters (and probably other places).

SIM: I think your best bet is to study here. I don't remember any of their ads. But that also means they weren't bad enough to leave stinky footprints in my mind.

UNSW: I feel you maan.

In case advertisers are going, "hey he remembered our ads! as long as there is ad recall it means it worked!"

Sorry to say, no it did not work the way you wanted it to. In any case I make conscious efforts to notice ads. Yours were for all the wrong reasons.

damnus

2007-05-29T21:22:00.000+08:00

NUS is here again. in our ad space.

Infiltration and Contamination.

Question:
How many Ph.Ds does it take to make the connection between the letter "N", the words "NUS", and "join"?

I am not interested in the answer.

Anyway, since when did NUS encourage students to break limits?! Maybe they are. You know, like, breaking the limit of sanity after muggin for hours. Or encouraging muggers to break the limit of the 5.0 CAP.

They would do better to change the copy to, "We say (some) limits are there to be broken, as long as you don't give us admin trouble mmkay?"

well... AT LEAST, NUS ads aren't in the SICKENINGLY FAKE done-to-death format.

One good example coming up, in my next post.

cure for later

2007-02-21T17:28:00.000+08:00

a cure for procrastination is needed

and the person who discovers it
will be making millions.